One Shots
by EvaFlack001
Summary: Series of one shots based on Cam/Carolyn. Just random pieces, not connected to each other. All prompts welcome! Chapter 12 up now!
1. Tears

**This is going to be a series of one-shots based around my favourite SG1 character, the delicious Colonel Cameron Mitchell, and the (in my humble opinion) very understated character of Carolyn Lam. **

**I think that they are really great**** together and my brain is buzzing with this one so I'm just going to let it out and hopefully it'll help me to complete my other story, "Coming Back Home". I have one chapter left of it to complete and the sequel has already 2 chapters done. **

**This one is a kind of AU/extra scene from the episode when General Landry got sick from the Prior plague. For the life of me I can't remember what it's called right now and my box set is at home. It's been bugging me and I had to get it out of my head and onto the screen before I went mad.**

**Tears**

Carolyn sat alone in the observation room above her infirmary, watching as her father slept in one of the eight beds below. She rubbed at her neck, trying to ease some of the tension in it.

_You're infected._

Her own words echoed in her head, bouncing around and around until she shook her head violently to stop them. A glance at her watch told her that it was four am. Thirty six hours without sleep, she thought ruefully, but she knew that there was no way she could sleep.

Anxiety gnawed at her stomach, causing a dull ache that her doctor's instincts told her wasn't good. Thirty six hours without sleep meant thirty six hours of too much caffeine and sugar, but what choice did she have.

The Ori plague was sweeping across the country and it was only a matter of time before the rest of the world got infected too. People were dying around her and there wasn't a damn thing she could do about it.

That was the bitter truth and she couldn't ignore it.

"Doc?"

She swung around to the door as the deep male voice brought her out of her reverie. Cameron Mitchell stood, arms folded, watching her. His eyes were bloodshot with fatigue, his sandy hair dishevelled from running his hands through it.

"How's he doing?" Cam looked at the general, his expression sober.

"He's stable," Carolyn answered evenly, her gaze returning to the eight life signs flickering on the large flat-screen monitor in front of her. "For now."

"And how are you doing?"

The quiet question made her blink and look up at him. His blue eyes locked on hers, making them sting with tears. She blinked them back viciously. No time for tears now. "I'm fine, thank you, Colonel."

"You've been running on caffeine and power bars for twenty four hours now," he contradicted, giving her a pointed glance.

"Thirty-six," she corrected, attempting to smile at him and wondering how he had noticed what she was or wasn't eating for the past two days.

"Whatever." He waved off her futile attempt to lighten the atmosphere and noticed that her attention had returned to the screen in front of her and the eight lines that indicated heartbeats. "Doctor, you can't keep this up."

Something inside her snapped. "I'm the CMO, Colonel. It's my job to keep going and to make sure that these people keep fighting." She waved at the glass that separated her from the eight people below her.

"This one." She stabbed a finger towards the monitor. "That line there is the heartbeat of Captain John Nelson. He's twenty eight years old. His wife just had their first child."

"Doc…"

"It was a girl," she continued as if he hadn't spoken. "He's at the critical stage now, and the last six patients I treated at this level of development died within twelve hours."

"Doc…" He tried again, watching her get off her chair and begin to pace like a caged lioness in the small room. "Don't."

"His wife won't get to say goodbye. His little girl will never know her father." Her voice cracked and she stopped pacing to look down at General Landry. "That's just another crime."

"Carolyn." Cam touched her shoulder. "You did everything you could. For all of them."

Her dark eyes were bitter when she turned back to look at him. "It's not enough, Colonel."

Just as he opened his mouth to reply, one of the lines on her monitor flattened and emitted a familiar, flat beep. She looked over for a moment to determine which it was and cursed. "Dammit. That's Nelson."

Cam could only watch helplessly as she ran out of the room and down the short flight of stairs. Moments later she appeared and he swore loudly when he realised that she had no mask on. She worked feverishly over Nelson's prone body, pumping adrenaline and charging up the defibrillator to try and shock him back to life.

Twenty minutes later, her shoulders slumped and she shook her head. Cam saw her mouth move and closed his eyes. He didn't need to see or hear what she was saying to know the words.

_Time of death, four forty three am. _

She looked up at him, meeting his gaze wordlessly before she shook her head and turned to check on her other patients.

* * *

He found her a half hour later, back in the same observation room, staring at the same flat screen with the same eight monitors glaring back at her.

"His wife will be finding out by now," she said flatly. "She'll never know how he died, or why. And neither will her daughter."

He saw her eyes dart to her father's sleeping form and knew that she wasn't just talking about Mrs Nelson and her little girl anymore.

"The Air Force takes care of its own," he said slowly, wishing that he could say something to make this even a little better for her. "She'll be well taken care of."

"That's not enough, Colonel," Carolyn hissed, springing from her chair. Her eyes snapped with temper and fatigue and a grief he had never seen in her before. "That little girl won't know why her father died, and she won't care. All she'll know is that he won't be around when she needs him and why her mom will always be sad and lonely."

"Stop it." He stepped forward and gripped her shoulders, feeling her vibrate with tension under his hands. This was a side of the cool, collected and very professional Dr Carolyn Lam that he had never seen. "Don't do this to yourself."

"I can't help them." Defeated, she bowed her head and closed her eyes.

Cam tipped a finger under her chin, forcing her to look up at him. "Listen to me. You are doing everything you can. Everything," he repeated when Carolyn shook her head. "If they die, it's not your fault."

"He's my father," she whispered. "And I've been so angry at him for so long…and now…"

"Just don't give up," Cam ordered, giving her a gentle shake to emphasize his words.

She surprised them both by dropping her head to rest it against his chest, just for a moment. The desire, the _need_ to have someone hold her, just for even a minute, frightened her. She'd never considered herself to be needy.

The thought made her pull away slightly and fold her arms to keep from reaching out to him again.

"Colonel?" She attempted a smile, but failed. "Thank you."

He nodded and reached out to squeeze her shoulder once before he left the room.

The next twenty four hours continued in much the same fashion as the previous thirty six. Carolyn sat in the infirmary, watching her patients, powerless to stop the disease that was ravaging them slowly. Her father was slipping rapidly towards the critical stages of the disease and it looked like she was going to lose him all over again and this time he wouldn't be back.

Cam knocked softly on the wall, startling her. "Sorry," he said quietly as she jumped and sprang to her feet. "Didn't mean to scare you."

Something in his expression made her narrow her eyes. "What? What happened? Did you find something?"

"We're not sure," he answered, pointing to the infirmary. "Look."

Carolyn whirled around as a bright light shot through the room and out into the building. It grew brighter and brighter until she had to shield her eyes from the glare. When the light died, a man was standing in the room, looking at them all defiantly. Seconds later, she saw him cry out some unknown words before he burst into flames and disappeared.

"God," she whispered, for sheer lack of anything else to say. Her eyes widened as people on the beds began to stir. "Oh my God."

Cam watched as she flew down the stairs and into the room where her father was sitting up and looking around him. He didn't miss the way she stopped for a second and met the general's eyes before going straight to his bedside and pulling out her stethoscope.

Cam say the general smile and say something and found himself smiling too as Carolyn gripped her father's hand tightly for a moment before moving on the her next patient.

Maybe she'd get the second chance she wouldn't admit she wanted now.

* * *

The threat was over, for now, thanks to the prior who had sacrificed himself to cure the disease. The sick had recovered, and things on the base were slowly getting back to normal. The dead had been released to their next of kin for burial and the staff at the SGC were getting some much needed rest.

Cam stood outside Carolyn's apartment door, wondering why he was even here. Captain Nelson had been buried that morning. His young widow had remained dry eyed and silent throughout the service, her baby daughter clutched tightly to her chest.

Cam had spotted Carolyn in the crowd and waved to her, noticing for the first time how pale she looked and that she'd lost some weight in the past week. She had hurried towards her car after paying her respects and left, so he hadn't had a chance to talk to her.

He knocked once, twice, and stood back. She answered moments later and her eyes widened when she saw him.

"Colonel? What's happened? My father…?"

"No, no, he's fine." Cam assured her, kicking himself for frightening her. "He's fine. I just wanted…I-"

"Come in," she offered, holding back the door so he could step inside. She was still wearing the plain black dress she had worn to the funeral. Her black high heels lay beside the sofa and she had pulled her dark hair loose from the severe bun it had been in that morning so it fell in a soft curtain around her face.

"I wanted to see how you were," Cam said simply, perching on the arm of her brown leather sofa.

Carolyn felt the burn of tears in the back of her throat and to her horror, they rose to her eyes.

"Hey, hey, it's okay," he soothed, stepping forward and reaching out to her, a little unnerved by the sight of her tears. Female tears always had that effect on him.

"No, please," she said frantically, skittering backwards. "Don't. I'm fine. I just need to sleep, that's all."

"Carolyn." Cam caught her hand, stilling the jerky movements. "It's okay."

It was the kindness in his voice and the caring in his blue eyes that did it. Undone, she sat on the sofa and began to weep helplessly.

Cam did the only thing he could think of. He pulled her into his lap and simply held on, letting her cry, knowing that even as strong and independent as she was, she still needed to let go sometimes.

When her sobs had slowed to shudders and the knot in her belly had loosened, she pulled back slightly to look up into his eyes. "I'm sorry," she whispered quietly, mortified at seeing the wet patch on his shirt. "I'm sorry."

Cam tightened his grip when she tried to scramble from his lap. "You needed it."

She relaxed enough to smile. "I don't do this very often."

"What?" Cam joked. "Sit on my lap?"

She snorted and swatted at him. "Cry." Her gaze was serious. "I've never been the crying type."

"Nothing wrong with letting go some, now and again," Cam pointed out, still not loosening his hold on her waist. "And I have no objection to you sitting on my lap."

Carolyn yawned suddenly, making them both laugh. "Sorry," she apologized. "I haven't slept properly in-"

"A week," Cam said sternly, frowning at her. "Seems to me that you ought to sleep for at least twelve hours before you even think about going back on duty."

"I tried," Carolyn admitted in a small voice. "I got as far as three before I woke up."

"Nightmares?" Cam asked gently, sighing when she nodded once. "Okay. How about we try this? You sit here and rest a while and I'll make you some tea." He tightened his arms around her again. "You've had enough of coffee."

Carolyn nodded against his chest and sighed contentedly as he rested his cheek on top of her head. "Thank you," she murmured, smiling when she felt him press his lips to her hair.

"You're welcome," he whispered back.

Moments later, she was sleeping peacefully and Cam decided that maybe female tears weren't all bad, after all.

_The End. _

_I know its a little AU and please excuse any mistakes; it's not beta-d at all. But do let me know what you think of it, please and thanks! _


	2. Tingles

**I got a great response from the last chapter, considering I didn't think I'd get any at all so I've been inspired to write another chapter of this.**

**To my 6 reviewers, thank you! And especially to **_**daisyscrapper**_**who inspired me to write more of Cam (think she loves him almost as much as I do!)**

**Again, my usual beta is up to her ears in school work, so this is coming to you fresh from my brain and any mistakes are my own. **

**Also, don't own Stargate, if I did, Cam would be stationed in Ireland and travelling to see me every weekend! **

**I'm taking this one from Season 9's episode, Prototype. **

**Chapter 2: Tingly**

Carolyn opened her eyes and immediately shut them again as pain lanced sharply through her head. She lay perfectly still, hoping that it would go away. Seconds later, she decided that it might just be safe to try and move. Very, very slowly.

Wincing at the ache in her shoulder, she struggled to sit up and tried to ignore the pounding at the base of her skull and behind her eyes. A quick mental survey told her that all her limbs were intact despite the tingling through them.

_Damn ascending alien hybrids_, she thought with a scowl as she looked at her watch and realised that she had lost three hours of her day. She scooted to the edge of the bed and saw her shoes lying on the floor.

Casting a glance around her, she noticed that three beds were occupied with people who appeared to be sleeping off the effects of the stun gun Khalek had used to knock them out.

She carefully slid to the floor and took a step towards her shoes. Her knees gave way under her and she cursed as she felt herself falling to the floor, knowing that it would put bruises on her already bruised body.

She never hit the floor.

Cam Mitchell entered the infirmary just in time to see the CMO slide off the bed and towards the floor. In one swift movement he was across the room, ignoring the jolt of pain it sent through his abused body. He caught her just as she was about to hit the floor and deposited her neatly back on the bed again.

"Doctor." He turned steely blue eyes on her. "What are you doing?"

"Getting up," she retorted, glaring back at him. "And what do you mean, what am I doing? Aren't you the one who ended up being thrown backwards several feet and colliding with a concrete wall?"

_Points for her_, Cam admitted silently as the dull headache that had been throbbing since his body connected with said concrete wall increased slightly. He pointed at her. "Stunned," was all he said, folding his arms defiantly.

"Pilot." Carolyn jabbed a finger in his direction. "Doctor." She pointed to herself and raised her eyebrows.

"You were the one who almost ended up on the floor," Cam scowled, shifting slightly and rubbing the back of his neck.

"Sit down," she ordered, taking in his pale face and the way he was holding himself stiffly. "Now, Colonel, or I'll have General Landry paged immediately."

Cam scowled and she eyeballed him. Finally, he gave up and perched on the edge of the trolley. "Happy now, Doc?"

Carolyn gave him a pointed look and slid off the bed again. She ignored the tingling in her legs and went to stand in front of him. "Lean forward." She shone her penlight in his eyes when he complied and frowned. "I think you have a concussion."

"So you said earlier," Cam mumbled, blinking against the light and turning his head away.

"Bruises?" she asked, prodding his sides and nodding when he winced. "I thought so."

A thought struck her and she looked up at him again. "Colonel Carter?"

"She's fine," Cam answered, suddenly becoming very aware of the fact that she was standing between his legs and poking at him. He was close enough to smell her perfume and the lemony scent of her shampoo. "She's up and at it, holed up with Jackson trying to find some answers to this whole mess."

"I suppose you tried to stop her getting up too," Carolyn said sarcastically.

"Sam's used to being stunned," Cam retorted. "You're not."

Carolyn pursed her lips and moved away from him. "I'll give you that," she said, sitting on the chair to put her shoes back on. "It's not an experience I'm looking to repeat anytime soon."

Cam frowned. "You hit the floor pretty hard before I could even reach out to catch you." He didn't tell her that she had knocked about ten years off his life when she convulsed and collapsed.

"You were otherwise occupied," Carolyn said dryly. "Trying not to get killed." She rolled her shoulders and winced involuntarily. "I'll live. Some bruises and a headache, but nothing a hot bath and a couple of Tylenol won't cure."

Carolyn got up from the chair and immediately wished she hadn't moved so quickly as a wave of dizziness came over her.

"Hey, hey!" Cam exclaimed, alarmed at the way she swayed slightly on her feet. He gripped her around her waist to steady her and gently pushed her back into the chair. "Sit down, Doc. You're pale as a ghost." He took her small hands in his larger one. "How do you feel now?"

"Tingly." Carolyn blurted out and turned bright red as he smirked. "And how about we forget I just said that."

"Tell you what, Doc," Cam grinned. "You let me out of here and I'll take you to the mess for some coffee. The walk might get rid of some of the pins and needles."

Carolyn nodded mutely and allowed herself to be hauled to her feet and led from the room.

They were halfway to the commissary when she realised that he still hadn't let go of her hands.

And she was still feeling "tingly".

_After effects,_ she told herself firmly. _Had to be_. It couldn't be anything to do with the fact that Mitchell was still holding her hand.

Could it?

**Anybody get the reference to another episode in there? Huh? BTW, if anyone has any prompts or ideas for further chapters, please send them to me in your review or by PM. **

**Eva.**


	3. Hurt

**Thanks to my few readers who are sticking with me. Lots of people looking for my poor Cam (I wish he was mine!) to be smacked around a little so I guess I'll just have to oblige **

**I'd like to take this opportunity to wish my usual Beta, Asugar the very best of luck as she prepares for a major exam. You go girl I know you can do this! **

**Chapter 3: Hurt **

"Dr Lam, it's the Odyssey. They want to talk to you."

Carolyn took the earpiece one of the nurses handed her and clipped it into her hear. "Odyssey, this is Lam. Go ahead."

"Dr Lam, this is Dr Kendrick from the Odyssey infirmary." The voice of the ship's medical officer sounded tinny and distorted. "Colonel Mitchell is ready for transport to your facility now."

"How is he?" Carolyn asked, signalling to Sadie, the chief trauma nurse, to prepare for their incoming patient.

"He's stable," Kendrick answered. "I'm sending his chart to you right now. You'll have a bit of work to do, I'm afraid. We did our best here, but the ship was damaged by the Replicator bugs so we're a little limited as to what we can do."

The tablet Carolyn carried beeped, letting her know that the incoming file had been received. She quickly opened it and stared with a mixture of disbelief and horror at the list of injuries he had sustained, not least of which was some internal bleeding that would require surgery. "Thank you, Doctor. We'll be standing by. Lam out."

Seconds later, a medical team from the Odyssey beamed directly into the room, Colonel Mitchell lying on a gurney between them. He was sporting cuts across his cheek, lips and the bridge of his nose as well as his forehead. The limbs that weren't covered by the blue hospital scrubs he wore were dotted liberally with bruises.

Carolyn blinked once, horrified at the sight of his injuries and immediately got to work. "Sadie, tell Carol to prep the OR right away. We need to get him into surgery now."

A low moan told her that he was waking up and probably in considerable pain. He opened his eyes and she noted with concern that they were blurry with pain. His hands fisted at his sides, then opened again.

"Colonel?" She watched as he twisted his head to look at her and moaned again. "Colonel, its Doctor Lam. You're at the SGC."

He opened his mouth to speak, but the one word came out sounding dry and raspy. "Hurts."

"I know," Carolyn said soothingly. "Can you tell me what day it is?"

"Tuesday." He moaned as she gently prodded his ribs. "Ow."

"Alright," Carolyn said, noticing that his he kept fisting his hand and gripping the blankets. "You're going to be just fine, Colonel. Stay with me, you hear me?"

"Yep," he managed before closing his eyes and falling into the darkness once more.

* * *

When Cam woke again the pain hadn't gone. It had intensified and throbbed through every part of him like wildfire. He opened his eyes and tried to look around. A soft beeping from his right side told him that he was in the infirmary.

So he hadn't imagined Carolyn talking to him, he mused painfully. She had been there, the first face he had seen when he came down from the Odyssey. And knowing her, she had fixed him up and would give him holy hell later on when he was strong enough to stand it.

The ache in his ribs intensified as he coughed, the sound coming out strangled. He shut his eyes again and fisted his hand tightly against the sharp throbbing.

A small, soft hand gripped his and he instantly opened his eyes again to look up into a pair of serious dark brown ones.

"Hi." Her voice was soft, low and comforting to his abused senses. "Nice to see you awake. How are you feeling?"

"Where's the truck?" Cam joked weakly.

She smiled and withdrew her hand to check on his vitals. "You had surgery to repair some internal bleeding. Twenty three stitches between your face, leg and back, and you have two broken ribs. Not to mention the bruising everywhere."

"You usually wait until I'm able to sit up before you give me the lecture," Cam replied. "How about we try the sitting up part."

"How about we don't," Carolyn immediately retorted. "You've had surgery, you're battered from head to toe and your face is a mess. You need to do what I'm telling you, Colonel. Don't even think about trying to charm my nurses into letting you do anything you're not supposed to."

"Have to charm somebody," he muttered crossly. "Never works on you."

She stopped in the middle of changing the IV bag hanging from the pole beside his bed. "You're obviously delirious, Colonel."

"That's nice," Cam said in disgust, even though he could feel the fatigue beginning to wash over him. Damn, he hated being sick. Couldn't even stay awake for five damn minutes. "You save the world and get abuse."

Carolyn noticed that he was fisting his hands again, clenching and unclenching as he usually did when he was in pain and didn't want to admit it.

With a small sigh, she pulled the curtain around the bed and dropped into the visitor's chair. "You should rest," she said quietly. "You nearly died, trying to save the world, Mr Superhero."

"Still saved it," he said, his face pale with the effort of trying to keep awake. "Guy always gets a kiss in the movies when he saves the world."

"Ssh," Carolyn murmured, knowing that the slurring of his words meant the pain medication she had put in his IV would help him to sleep. "Try to rest now."

His eyes fluttered closed, his hand still clenched. When she reached out and slipped her smaller one into it, he relaxed completely. She sighed. "You scared us all, Cameron."

Leaning over, she gently pressed her lips to his cheek once, twice and pressed her forehead to his for a moment.

"Sorry," he slurred, not opening his eyes. "Won't do that again." His lips curved slightly. "Got my kiss, though."

She could only laugh softly at him. "Go to sleep," she whispered. "I'll stay a while."

When Teal'c peered around the curtain an hour later, he saw the doctor curled up in the chair, eyes closed, holding tightly to the hand that was holding hers, even in sleep.

**I don't know how this one works, I'm not terribly good at writing the hurt/comfort scene, I don't think. But please let me know! I love feedback.**


	4. Jealousy

**Chapter 4: Jealousy**

The music was loud, the beer cold, the snacks plentiful. SG1 were enjoying a rare night off, tucked into a booth together in a corner of the bar.

Vala looked around at the assembled members of SG1 and sighed with satisfaction. "Isn't this lovely? All of us hanging out together, socialising, having some fun and some beer, some chops –"

"Chips," Daniel corrected, reaching out and grabbing a handful of the items in question. "Not chops, chips."

"Whatever," Vala said airily. "I was merely saying that we should spend more time together."

"We spend most of our time together, "Sam pointed out, leaning back in her chair and sipping at her beer.

"Outside of that bloody mountain," Vala shot back, exasperated. She turned to Teal'c. "Muscles, help me out. Don't you think this is lovely?"

"Indeed," Teal'c agreed serenely. "It is most pleasant."

Cam grinned at Vala. "We're only teasing you, Vala."

"We should be doing this once a week," Vala said, frowning at him. "It's the closest thing any of us have to a date."

"A group date," Sam mused, smiling. "Not the normal definition of the word date, but I guess we could make it a regular thing."

"That's just pathetic," Cam grumbled. "We're young, single, financially solvent, and aside from Jackson, pretty interesting."

"Thank you," Daniel said mildly, not rising to the bait. "But I believe that I am the one who is currently dating someone, not you. "

Cam choked on the beer he was drinking. "Who is she?" he managed when he got his breath back. "Where did you find her? You've spent the last three months on the base holed up in that lab of yours trying to decipher Merlin's research."

"I found her on the base," Daniel answered, his blue eyes twinkling. "Or should I say, she found me!"

"That's not strictly true," Vala said, giving him an adoring smile. "I like to think we found each other."

Cam's head swivelled back and forth between them, noticing for the first time the close proximity to each other and the way they were grinning at the rest of the team.

"I can't believe you didn't see this coming." Sam shook her head at Cam. "There was a betting pool."

Cam looked horrified. "A betting pool? Seriously? And why the hell wasn't I involved?"

"Teal'c won the jackpot," Sam told him, laughing when he slumped back into his seat and folded his arms.

"I find observing human behaviour to be very satisfactory," Teal'c said, lips curving into his customary slight smile. "I believe I will enjoy spending my winnings."

"That's just wrong," Cam said, shaking his head. "Jackson, why didn't you tell me."

"Because you would have driven me nuts," Daniel said. He looked up at the bar. "Who's turn is it to get the drinks?"

"Mine," Cam answered, rising to his feet. "I'll go- whoa!" His jaw dropped.

"What is it?" Sam asked, standing up to look over his shoulder. "Hey! Isn't that Doctor Lam?"

Cam squinted in the direction of the bar and felt a surge of irritation as he saw Carolyn Lam take a seat at a table, assisted by a man he could only describe as boring. Tailored shirt, slacks...Cam couldn't see his shoes but he was pretty sure that they were boring too.

"Wow," Daniel commented, craning his neck to get a better look. "She looks...different."

Cam could only nod in agreement, his frown deepening as Carolyn smiled up at the man. "Who's the pretty boy?"

"He's an accountant," Vala answered, idly playing with her hair. She looked up as four pairs of eyes turned to her. "What? I talk to Carolyn. She's a nice lady and she deserves a social life the same as we do!"

"Nobody said any differently," Cam said, narrowing his eyes when Pretty Boy attempted to take Carolyn's hand across the table. "But an accountant?"

"Why are you glaring like that?" Vala asked suddenly. When Cam didn't answer her eyes lit up with unholy glee. "Mitchell, you're jealous!"

Sam and Daniel had matching grins on their faces when Cam scowled. "I am not jealous."

Vala waited for him to elaborate. "That's it? That is the sum total of your argument? _I am not jealous?" _She laughed loudly. "That's pathetic, Mitchell."

Cam was still looking at Carolyn and Pretty Boy, frowning as the man moved his chair closer to Carolyn and leaned in towards her. He almost growled when Pretty Boy pressed a kiss to the doctor's cheek.

"I think he might be jealous," Sam said to Daniel in a stage whisper. "What do you think?"

Cam whipped his head back to give her a pointed glare. "Not deaf, Sam."

"I believe that you are indeed jealous, Colonel Mitchell," Teal'c interrupted smoothly. He had stayed silent until now, content to watch the exchange. "Your face is most expressive."

Cam gaped at him. "My – seriously? Expressive? What is _wrong_ with you people?"

"You're getting awfully worked up over this, Cam," Sam teased. "Why don't you ask her out if you think Accountant Guy is so wrong for her?"

"Because I'd be slapped down a couple of ranks," Cam retorted crossly.

"I knew it!" Vala was looking distinctly like the Cheshire cat now, grinning widely at the irate colonel. "You. Are. Jealous."

Cam thumped Daniel on the shoulder and pulled a lock of Sam's blonde hair. "Stop laughing at me, both of you. Y'all are like cats with canaries!"

"Colonel Mitchell, if I may offer some advice." Teal'c rested his chin on his hands. "Perhaps you should take some time and meditate on your feelings for Doctor Lam. This hostility you feel towards her companion is unusual behaviour for you." He smirked again. "Perhaps a journey to the bar might be a good opportunity to do this."

Cam scowled again. "I'm going to get more beer." He shoved his way out of the booth and made his way up to the bar. Resting his elbows on the counter, he waited to catch the barman's attention. He was so busy watching his team lean close together and sent furtive glances in his direction that he didn't see Carolyn until she was right in front of him.

"Colonel Mitchell?" She smiled politely at him. "What brings you here?"

"Hey, Doc." She smelled like those purple flowers his momma used to grow in pots outside their house and looked even better. That dark purple dress she wore was just revealing enough to make him wonder where she hid that incredible figure every day.

"Colonel?" She was looking at him strangely. "Are you feeling alright?"

"Huh?" He was distracted by the way her hair was loose, instead of in its usual bun, and skimming her shoulders in soft waves. "Sorry, Doc. I'm fine." He attempted to smile. "You look great."

"Thank you," Carolyn answered politely.

"Buy you a drink, Doc?" He could have kicked himself when he said the words. _Way to go, Mitchell. Now she'll think you're a complete idiot. _

"Thank you, but I'm here with somebody." Carolyn gestured towards Pretty Boy and Cam felt an urge to walk over and kick his ass into next Tuesday.

"Hot date?" he asked, trying to appear non committal.

"I wouldn't exactly go that far," she said wryly. "I doubt we'll repeat the experience."

Cam frowned. "Is he hassling you?"

Carolyn laughed. "Hardly, Colonel. He's just not my type."

"What's your type, Doc?" Cam asked, leaning back against the bar and looking at her.

She merely smiled and shook her head. "I need to get back to Karl. Enjoy your evening, Colonel." She turned to walk away and Cam had an insane urge to pull her back to him and thread his fingers through her hair to see if it was as soft as it looked.

He tucked his hands into his pockets and turned back towards the bar. When he heard his name, Cam turned around again.

Carolyn was standing in front of him, her dark brown eyes sparkling. "Maybe you could buy me that drink some other time?"

Cam's slow grin spread from ear to ear. "Sure thing, Doc." He watched her make her way back to her date, grinning the whole time.

"What kept you?" Daniel wanted to know when he arrived back to their table and passed bottles of beer around.

"Meditation," Cam said evasively. He caught Teal'c's eye and winked. "Worked a treat!"

**I need prompts for this one! Please! Hope you enjoy! **

**Eva x**


	5. Watching

**Chapter 5: Watching**

For the most part, Carolyn Lam was happy with her life. She was Chief Medical Officer of a top secret program that meant she had a chance to experience things that most people only dreamed of. The technology alone at her disposal was every doctor's dream.

But sometimes, especially now when she was standing, watching SG1 sit around Vala Maldoran's bed in her infirmary, she wished that she could be a part of something more. More what, exactly, she wasn't sure.

Carolyn stood back for a moment and simply observed the group in front of her. Vala lay on the high, narrow bed, sleeping peacefully thanks to the sedative Carolyn had administered. Even in sleep, Vala's hand tightly gripped Daniel Jackson's. Carolyn noted with a small smile that he wasn't objecting, either.

She wondered if Daniel knew that under all Vala's bluster, the woman had very deep feelings for him and was terrified of telling him about them. Daniel cast a quick look at Vala's face now and again, as if to remind himself that she was still there and that she hadn't been completely destroyed by the men who had taken her hostage and nearly managed to wipe all her memories away.

Sam Carter was saying something to Cam Mitchell in a teasing tone, her blue eyes dancing with amusement. Something about losing his pants...Carolyn didn't even want to go there. The image of Cam Mitchell without his pants was...interesting.

Some on the base speculated that Cam and Sam were involved, but Carolyn new better. The two officers were good friends. They had saved each other's lives more than once and Carolyn knew that Sam had sat for hours in the infirmary on more than one occasion when Mitchell had been injured.

She also knew that Cam had done the same for Sam and every other member of his team.

Teal'c and Daniel were obviously in on the joke, judging from the glint in the big Jaffa's eye. Cam was scowling at them all, but it was clear that there was no heat in it.

Carolyn watched them laugh at each other and felt a nagging discontentment seep through her . Her days and nights were usually the same. Go to work, come home –alone, she reminded herself with a rueful smile- and sleep. Press repeat and do it all again.

Cam looked over at the petite figure of the doctor and it struck him that she looked lonely. She didn't appear to have many friends on the base. He supposed being in her position made it difficult, especially when she was privy to so many intimate details about everyone at the SGC. He smiled at her, hoping it would make her smile back. One thing he had noticed about their CMO was her smile. It made her face light up and her lovely brown eyes twinkle.

"Hey, Doc. How's our patient doing?"

Carolyn moved towards them and took Vala's chart from the end of her bed. "She's going to be fine. I gave her a sedative to help her sleep so she'll be out for a few hours." She looked around at his teammates. "You should all go and get some sleep."

"We probably should," Cam mused, looking at his teammates. They all nodded agreement, but made no move to leave.

"But you won't,"Carolyn finished. She sighed. "Okay, fine. It's quiet in here so you can just take whatever beds and chairs are free." She eyeballed them all. "But if it gets busy or if we need the space, I'm kicking all of you out. Understood?"

"Yes ma'am," Cam said meekly, giving her a winning smile. "Thank you."

"Far be it from me to break up the gang," Carolyn said with an answering smile. "But you better not throw any wild parties."

"Got it," Cam agreed. He saw that lonely look flash across her face again as her eyes flicked towards Daniel and Vala. "Hey, Doc?"

She turned around, one eyebrow raised. "Yes?"

"I'm going to get some coffee and maybe some sandwiches from the mess. Why don't you sit with us and have some?"

Carolyn looked at him, puzzled, and realised that he was offering her some company that wasn't her laptop and a pile of patient charts. Throwing all caution to the winds, she gave him a genuine smile and nodded. "That would be nice. Thank you."

"My pleasure," was all he said as he sauntered out to get the snacks.

Carolyn went to her office to retrieve her pager and shut down her laptop. She quickly signed the last of her charts and hung her white lab coat on its peg behind her door.

When Cam saw her peer into the room a few minutes later, he patted the space beside him and handed her a cup of coffee when she boosted herself up to sit at his side.

"Doctor Lam," Daniel began, giving her a bright smile. "Have you heard the story of how Colonel Mitchell lost his pants?"

AS Cam groaned and his teammates laughed, Carolyn realised that for once, she was on the inside, not outside looking in.

And, she thought, looking up at Cam's face and smiling, it wasn't a bad place to be.

**That one was a little sad, I think, but sometimes I think that Carolyn looks a little sad. So I took some artistic liberty and put my own spin on why. Hope you enjoyed it. And I have started on a longer Cam/Carolyn story because my Atlantis beta is so busy she hasn't time at the moment to edit my Atlantis stories. So as usual, all this stuff is my own and any mistakes are mine. **


	6. Angry

**I'm so sorry it's been so long, I've been away on holidays for the last couple of weeks! I thought it was time for some fluff so here it is. Enjoy it! **

**Eva x**

**Chapter 6: Angry **

Cam threw his bag on the floor of the gym and pulled on a pair of gloves before attacking the punching bag with more force than was necessary.

Of all the stupid, idiotic, hair-brained, foolish things…Doctor Lam was going to be the death of him.

She just had to go and get herself taken captive, didn't she? Had to be the doctor with all the answers and get taken hostage because the villagers didn't want to let her go back to Earth.

And instead of thanking him politely when he had risked life and limb to rescue her, she had glared at him and demanded that she take the kid first and come back for her.

Luckily, the people holding her were even more careless than she was and hadn't really thought their plan through, making it easy for him to slip inside the unguarded building and get her out.

He had been saved having to make the decision by Teal'c, who had obligingly taken the sick little girl to safety, leaving Cam to escort the irate doctor out of the building. She had tripped on a tree stump while running, turning her ankle hard, yet she'd resisted any and all attempts to carry her. Cam had little choice but to toss her over his shoulder and carry her back to the gate that way and she really hadn't liked that at all.

"Damn stubborn woman…" Cam muttered, lashing at the bag with a solid right arm and a kick.

She had knocked almost ten years off his life when he had come into the little room and found her and the child missing. He had been terrified that she would get hurt, or worse. All the dangers that could befall a beautiful woman without any weapons on an alien planet flickered through his head as he continued his assault on the bag.

It had occurred to him that maybe his reasons for being so freaked out were more than just the fact that she was the General's daughter and he'd be slapped down a few ranks if he came back without her. He had dismissed the notion as soon as it came into his head and continued with his mission to find the damn woman and give her a piece of his mind.

"Cam?" Daniel stood at the doorway with Teal'c, watching him with a bemused expression. "Why are you trying to kill that punching bag?"

"Because," Cam said through gritted teeth, "if I don't kill the bag, I'll wring her neck."

"Whose neck?" Daniel demanded, coming to hold the bag while Cam continued his assault. "What are you talking about?"

Cam stopped and wiped the sweat from his eyes. He had forgotten that Daniel hadn't been with them today. The archaeologist had gone with SG-3 to check out some form of Ori technology that had been abandoned on MX9-008.

"I believe that Colonel Mitchell is speaking of Doctor Lam," Teal'c said calmly. "SG-1 were escorting her on a medical mission today and she was unfortunately taken captive."

Daniel gaped at Cam. "Seriously? Is she alright?"

Cam snorted. "She's fine. Woman has a head like a rock."

"She hit her head?" Daniel asked, confused. "I thought you said she was fine?"

Cam snorted again. "She's as stubborn as a damn mule, Jackson. She was treating a little girl with an infected cut on her arm when some of the villagers decided to keep her for themselves."

"Oh." Daniel nodded. "And then what happened?"

"Doctor Lam refused to accompany them," Teal'c continued. "They threatened to injure the child and when Doctor Lam insisted on her release, they took both of them."

"So Teal'c and I risked life and limb to go and rescue them, naturally." Cam grabbed a bottle of water from his bag and downed half the contents without stopping. "Luckily the idiots who took them had one brain cell between them and left them unguarded."

"Life and limb?" Daniel asked sarcastically. "Really? Life _and_ limb?"

"Shut up." Cam took off his gloves and leaned against the wall. "She refused to leave without the kid, so Teal'c took her and I got stuck with the doctor. Who didn't even say thank you!"

"Doctor Lam thanked me very politely," Teal'c pointed out with a small smile. "She was most gracious."

"What?" Cam glared at the Jaffa. "She what?"

"Now Cam," Daniel said soothingly, fighting to keep a straight face. "I'm sure she just hadn't gotten around to thanking you yet."

Cam spared him a scorching look and grabbed his bag. "We'll just see about that."

Watching the colonel storm from the room, Daniel burst into laughter. "I'm not missing this," he told Teal'c.

"Indeed," the Jaffa agreed. "It will be most interesting." He followed Daniel from the gym and headed towards the infirmary, not wanting to miss the show.

* * *

Carolyn winced as she tried to bear weight on her injured ankle. Damn stupid Air Force flyboys and their egos. Imagine the nerve of Mitchell, showing up with his charming grin and his southern, good ol' boy charm and insisting that she come with him. _Before the sick child?_

She reached for the crutch beside her desk just as the office door crashed open and she was confronted by a tall, very angry male.

"What the hell did you think you were doing out there?" Mitchell demanded, towering over her. His hair was wet, from the shower, she presumed, as he smelled like soap and shampoo.

"Colonel Mitchell, I suggest that you leave my office if you can't be civil," Carolyn said evenly, trying to get past him.

Cam merely slapped a hand against the wall, blocking her exit with his arm. "Are you plumb crazy? You could have gotten killed. We could have gotten killed getting you out!"

"The building was unguarded," Carolyn reminded him, her temper flaring. "And who do you think you are, tossing me over your shoulder like a sack of potatoes?"

"You hurt yourself!" Cam exclaimed. "Ankle, remember?" He looked pointedly at the crutch propped against her desk.

"I was fine." Carolyn ignored the dart of pain through her sprained foot and tried to pass him again. "I would have made it."

"My ass," Cam scoffed. "You'd have been taken again, and tell me how the hell I'd have explained that to Landry?"

Carolyn felt as if he'd punched her in the gut. She summoned her self control and glared up at him. "Thank you, Colonel. It's good to know that you're only worried about your military career. I'll be sure to sign a disclaimer if I'm off-world with you again. That way you can be sure that General Landry won't slap you down if something happens to me."

Cam's blue eyes blazed with anger and he gripped her arms. "Are you nuts? You think that the General was my first concern when I went into that room and found you gone?"

He loomed over her, frustration and anger coming from him in waves. Carolyn's reply was cut off when he crashed his mouth to hers, kissing her furiously.

Carolyn gripped his shirt in both hands and returned the kiss, savouring the feeling of his arms around her. Suddenly, his warmth was replaced with a sudden rush of cool air, making her almost whimper from the loss of contact. Before she could even look at him, he pulled her to him and held her tightly. "You scared the hell out of me," he murmured, running a hand over her soft ponytail. "Don't do that again. Ever."

She pulled back, intent on giving him a piece of her mind but was cut off by his lips on hers again. She burrowed against him again, not considering where they were, who was watching or who could potentially come in and see them.

A snort and a giggle made them break apart reluctantly. Vala, Daniel, Teal'c and Sam were watching, along with two enthralled nurses.

"Told you," Daniel said to Sam, smirking as Cam frowned at them.

"You were indeed correct, Daniel Jackson," Teal'c agreed. "Colonel Mitchell is, as Vala MalDoran says, "hot" for Doctor Lam."

"Shut up," Cam suggested rudely, taking Carolyn's arm and tugging her in the direction of her office. He frowned at her sharp inhalation and remembered her injured ankle. He swept her into his arms, ignoring her protest and slammed the door of her office with his foot.

"Now." He sat on the nearest chair, cradling her in his lap, and grinned. "Where were we?"

"You were worried about me," Carolyn murmured, pressing her forehead to his. "Why?"

"You need to ask?" Cam tightened his grip on her waist. "Anything could have happened to you." _And what would I do if..._

Carolyn shook her head. "You wouldn't have let it." She kissed him gently. "Are you ever going to ask me on a date?"

Cam grinned. "I'm going to have to, now. Word's going to hit your daddy that we were seen kissing in the infirmary."

Carolyn smiled. "You better be dating me by then." She laughed and leaned in for another kiss. "Or he'll send you to Pegasus to get you away from me!"

Cam thought before she robbed him of his ability to concentrate was that it would be totally and completely worth it.

**Love it? Hate it? Let me know!**


	7. Waiting

**Hi guys, apologies for the delay and I apologise in advance if this is too angsty for people, I'm in that kind of mood. Thank you so much to my reviewers, I really appreciate your input and encouragement! **

**Eva**

**Chapter : Waiting**

Carolyn stared at the computer screen until her eyes blurred, but it still didn't erase the memory of seeing SG1 come through the gate three weeks ago, bruised, filthy and without Cameron Mitchell.

_Where was he? _

The question screamed through her brain, even as she fought the instinct to refer to him in as being in the past. Where_ is_ he, she silently corrected herself, her hand lifting of her own accord to touch the little silver, heart-shaped locket that he had given to her after their sixth date and before SG1 went off-world on a particularly long mission.

So that she would have a little piece of him, he had said with that lopsided grin that made her heart beat just a little faster. She had smiled in return and squeezed his hand tightly before going back to her paperwork.

Was that it? Was that all she would get? Just three months of stolen kisses when they were sure people weren't watching? Sneaking around because she just wasn't ready to deal with the repercussions of dating an Air Force officer? Damn it, she wanted more. She wanted more time.

She wanted...him.

Cam had wanted to tell people. His team, he had argued, weren't just people. They were his family and they were already starting to suspect something was up. Nothing got past Vala MalDoran, he had argued.

Carolyn had asked him to wait until she was used to the idea herself and as always, he had agreed and simply wrapped her in his arms and held her tightly before kissing her goodnight or goodbye or kissing her just _because_.

The search teams had deployed immediately. Every marine and airman on the base along with most of the civilian staff had wanted to help in some small way to bring home a man who was highly respected and liked by all of them.

Carolyn herself had volunteered to join SG1's attempts to find their leader, but General Landry had refused, saying that she wasnt trained to negotiate the destroyed terrain left behind by the landslide that had swept Cameron away. She had stayed back in the Infirmary and dealt with the returning search teams and kept herself busy with inventory and extra shifts, but even that couldn't take away the emptiness and the solitude of the infirmary at night.

If anyone noticed that the CMO kept calling the control room for updates or looking at the door every five minutes, they didn't comment.

Why hadn't she just taken the plunge and made their relationship public when he had asked her to? She had just shaken her head and refused to talk about it and he had looked disappointed and kissed her forehead and said that they needed to talk when he returned from his mission. Of course, he'd returned with a list of injuries and they had never actually talked about anything.

Carolyn closed her eyes, hearing the last conversation that they had had in her head.

"_I can't wait for you to make up your mind, Carolyn. I need to know what you want from me." _

_The words had been out of her mouth before she could stop them. "I want you to leave me alone right now, Cameron. Please." _

_His face had immediately gone stony, his blue eyes shuttered. "If that's what you want." _

_Carolyn had instantly regretted her reply and opened her mouth to speak, but he pressed a kiss to her forehead and left. "I'll see you soon, Doc." _

Only this time, he hadn't come home.

Carolyn dropped her head into her hands, her eyes burning with fatigue and unshed tears. The sound of her name made her lift her head to meet Vala's sympathetic gaze.

"Vala? Are you okay?" She got to her feet hurriedly, her gaze going immediately to the bandage on Vala's arm. "Have you hurt yourself again?"

"No, I'm fine," Vala assured her, noting the pallor of the doctor's face and the dark circles under Carolyn's eyes. "I was just coming to see if you wanted to come to the mess with us and maybe eat something."

Carolyn pressed her hand to her stomach, the thought of food making her feel queasy. "I'm sorry. Maybe some other time, Vala. I've got a lot of work to do."

"At..." Vala consulted her watch. "Four in the morning?"

Carolyn shook her head. "Okay. One cup of coffee."

Vala smiled in satisfaction, but it was fleeting. Something vital was missing now, they all felt it, but none of them were ready to talk about it yet.

* * *

Daniel closed the door of his office, fighting the urge to slam it and kick the walls. He looked at the group clustered around his table and sighed, shaking his head once. Vala's eyes filled as she reached out one hand to grip Sam Carter's tightly.

"They are discontinuing the search for Colonel Mitchell." Teal'c spoke flatly, his face void of emotion.

"It's been six weeks," Sam said, her voice wavering slightly as she blinked furiously at the tears that were gathering in her eyes. "No sign of him. He'd have found some way to contact us if he were..."

"Oh God," Vala said suddenly. "Who's going to tell Carolyn?"

The past six weeks had confirmed what they had all suspected. Cam hadn't told them outright that he and Carolyn were dating, but they had known. The sight of the CMO burying herself in paperwork and becoming a shadow of herself had said more than words ever could.

"These weeks have taken a toll on Doctor Lam," Teal'c said, folding his arms across his chest. "This will come as a great shock to her."

"I'll tell her," Sam volunteered. "She'll want to hear it from one of us."

"No," Daniel said quietly. "_We'll_ tell her."

* * *

Carolyn looked up when the four members of SG1 entered the infirmary. One look at Daniel's face told her what he was going to say. She shook her head blindly and turned away from them. Daniel stepped forward, just as the PA system activated and the klaxon signalling an off-world activation sounded through the mountain.

"SG1, please report to the gate-room."

They responded immediately, running out of the room and leaving Carolyn alone with the eyes of three nurses and a doctor on her. She stared at them helplessly, unable to move.

"Dr Lam, please report to the Gate-Room immediately." The command boomed through the infirmary, jolting her out of her stupor and making her head straight for the door.

Running into the Gate-Room five minutes later, she came face to face with a sight that almost brought her to her knees with shock.

Cameron stood at the base of the ramp, emaciated, dirty and covered with bruises, but _alive_. Carolyn closed her eyes, hoping that she hadn't finally gone mad and slowly opened them again.

He continued to look at her, the dazed look in his eyes clearing slightly as he came forward. Nobody moved, all wondering how this had happened at all and what the colonel was going to do now.

"Cam?" Carolyn choked out, stretching her hand out to him. "Cam?"

He gripped her hand with his and Carolyn felt herself get pulled down by the weight of his body as his eyes rolled in his head and he fell to the ground in a dead faint.

* * *

The sound of a soft beeping permeated Cam's brain as he struggled to open his eyes. He uttered a soft groan and felt hands touch his head, his wrists before the blessed darkness descended on him again.

When he came to again he looked around and saw Carolyn sleeping in the chair next to his bed. Her fingers were curled loosely around the little silver locket he had given her. The sight made him smile despite the aches in his body.

She stirred and her eyes opened to meet his, her hand tightening around her locket.

"Hey," Cam said softly. "Sorry I passed out on you."

Carolyn shook her head and got to her feet, feeling her throat ache with the tears she had refused to shed for six weeks.

Cam looked more closely at her and saw the toll his disappearance had taken on her. She was thinner and her face was pale with fatigue. Her hands shook slightly as she checked his IV and made notes on his chart. _Oh Carolyn, what have you been doing to yourself?_

"You should be back on your feet in a week," she said, avoiding his eyes and scanning his chart. "But no work for at least three more and even then it's paperwork only until you gain some weight and you're back to full strength."

"Carolyn," Cam interrupted quietly, holding a hand out to her.

Carolyn shook her head blindly. "We kept you sedated for the past few days to give your body a chance to heal itself, but we had to use the Tok'ra healing device to boost what we gave you."

"Carolyn..." Cam tried again, hating the way her voice wavered and her hands shook.

"So you need to rest," Carolyn interrupted, still refusing to look at him. "You gave your team quite a scare. The search was called off the day you came back. They said that..."

Cam managed to gather enough strength to reach out far enough to take her hand. The contact seemed to break something in her, because her eyes met his at last and she seemed to crumble in on herself.

Cam closed his eyes as she slumped against him and wrapped both arms around her, ignoring the sharp twinges in his shoulders and back. "Sssh," he murmured over and over. "It's okay. It's okay."

When Daniel and Sam peered through the curtain surrounding his cubicle, he shook his head at them and continued to stroke a soothing hand down Carolyn's hair.

When her sobs slowed to hicuping shudders, she looked up at him and the pain in her eyes almost broke his heart. "Carolyn, baby, don't..."

"I'm sorry," she whispered, "so sorry."

"Listen to me," Cam said fiercely. "You have nothing to be sorry for. You hear me? Nothing."

"But we fought," Carolyn cried, rubbing at her eyes like a child. The gesture would have made him smile any other day. "And I thought that you were angry with me and then you didn't come home."

"I came home," Cam interrupted, brushing at her tears with his thumbs. "So the rest doesn't matter."

Carolyn nodded mutely and closed her eyes as Cam drew her against his chest until she was lying down beside him. It would be alright now. He was home.

When General Landry pushed aside the curtain an hour later, he was met with the sight of his daughter curled up beside Mitchell on the narrow bed, both fast asleep. He sighed, admitting to himself that he had seen this one coming, no matter how discreet Carolyn had tried to be. He sighed again and pulled back the curtain to give them some privacy.

Landry smiled to himself as he made his way back to his office. Damned if it wasn't going to be fun to watch Mitchell squirm when he confronted him about this one!

**I'd really like your opinions on this one! I'm not sure about it, but I know I can rely on you all to tell me!  
**


	8. Apologies

Hi All,

Normally I do not write these kind of author's notes, but I just wanted to clear up my long absence following a review in which someone posted that they were sick of waiting.

I have been quite ill for the last few months, I don't want to go into specifics, but it's ongoing and I'm not really over the worst of it yet so if I am slow to get back to writing, please excuse me. Energy is in short supply at the moment.

To those of you who are following me, I ask that you are patient a little longer. I have no plans to abandon "One Shots" or any of my other SGA stories. I'm merely a little weak right now and not quite up to regular updates as I have work to catch up on after being absent for a while.

Hope that life is treating you all well!

Eva x


	9. Loss

**This is an angsty little piece, mainly due to the fact that a good friend of mine is mourning the loss of her baby at only 22 weeks pregnant. I would therefore like to ask for your prayers (if you are that way inclined)**** for the little soul that never made it to this world. **

**Chapter 8: Loss**

"_I'm pregnant." _

Carolyn's words echoed through Cam's brain, along with the remembrance of the almost dizzying joy that had accompanied them. Not even morning sickness and extreme fatigue had dimmed the glow in her eyes and the happiness that seemed to vibrate in the air around her.

Carolyn had always wanted a family. She had confided that to him when they were lying in his big bed one night, the rain falling steadily outside. She had curled into his side, idly tracing patterns on his bare chest with her fingertips and asked him tentatively if he wanted to have a family.

"_I've__ always wanted to have children. Don't you want to make a family of your own someday?"_

They had agreed to start trying immediately after their wedding and eight weeks ago, Carolyn had told him the words he had been waiting for.

"_I'm pregnant, Cam. We're going to have a b__aby!" _

The sound of his wife's words blurred against another, more recent memory, this one coming with a swift stab of pain that took his breath.

"_Carolyn?" Cam called out as he closed the front door of their house and tossed his keys on the hall cabinet. He slung his jacket over the stairs and headed up, two at a time. "Honey, I'm home!"_

_Entering their bedroom, he smiled at the sight of his wife curled around a pillow, sound asleep. She had been so tired since she had discovered her pregnancy, he thought, tiptoeing across the room towards their bathroom so as not to wake her. _

_He took a quick shower and padded back into their bedroom ten minutes later, pulling on a pair of sweatpants and a cotton t-shirt.. Carolyn was still sleeping peacefully. Cam gently took the pillow from her and settled into the space beside her, wrapping his arms around her and smiling at the way one hand rested on her stomach, even in sleep. He drifted into a light doze, lulled by the steady sound of her breathing. _

_He was woken when she stirred and smiled sleepily at him. "Hi." _

"_Hi, yourself." Cam kissed the tip of her nose. "How are you feeling?" _

"_Better now," she answered, sitting up and pushing her dark hair from her face. "And a little hungry." _

_Cam laughed and pushed himself off the bed, sticking his feet into his trainers.. "I'll start dinner. What does Baby feel like today?"_

"_Nothing too spicy." Carolyn made a face. "Heartburn sucks. How about something light, like chicken salad?"_

"_Your wish is my command." Cam paused at the doorway, watching as Carolyn slipped her feet into the fuzzy blue slippers Teal'c had given her for Christmas. "Love you." _

_She smiled brightly at him. "We love you too." _

_Cam sauntered downstairs, smiling to himself. He didn't care how cliché they sounded, he was going to be a daddy, damn it, and he was allowed to be cheesy. _

_He allowed himself to daydream as he gathered the makings of dinner. He wondered what his child would look like, if it would be a boy or girl, if it would have Carolyn's dark colouring or his fair. _

**"_Cam!" _**

_The panicked cry had him dropping the plate and sprinting towards the stairs as it shattered on the floor. Carolyn was leaning against the sink for support, her face ashen. The next words she spoke sent chills through him. _

"_Something's wrong." _

_Cam reacted on pure instinct. He scooped her into his arms and ran down the stairs, pausing only to grab the keys of his car. Bundling her into it, he headed straight for the hospital, breaking every speed limit on the way. In the ER, the nurse ushered them past the waiting patients and straight to a cubicle. She then told Cam firmly but kindly to wait outside while the doctors attended to Carolyn. _

_It was only then that he noticed the blood on his t-shirt. Just a small smear, but the realisation of what it might mean made his knees go weak. The nurses bustled in and out of the cubicle and he could hear words like ultrasound, bleeding and pain relief through the curtains. _

_Moments later, the nurse that had greeted them on arrival stepped outside. When her eyes met his, Cam didn't need to hear his wife's low, heartbroken moan to know what had happened. _

The sound still haunted him. Cam paused outside the door to their bedroom, wondering if she might talk to him today. It had been two weeks since her miscarriage and Carolyn hadn't uttered a word or shed a tear. It was as if the pain was too deep for that.

General Landry had visited, offered his condolences for the loss of the grandchild he hadn't even known about yet. SG-1 had come and gone, their silent support breaking through the haze of grief and worry. Daniel had taken him aside and gently told him that his loss was no less than Carolyn's, just different, and if he needed to talk, Daniel would listen.

"Carolyn?" Cam called out softly. When he got no answer, he stepped further inside the darkened room. "Carolyn?"

She was lying on her side, her hair covering her face. Her eyes were open, staring into space at something he couldn't see. This was a side of his wife he had never encountered. Carolyn was one of the strongest people he had ever known. She was extremely independent and more than capable of looking after herself. He knew that her feelings ran deep, but this raw grief was something new, something that even he couldn't reach.

He sat down at the edge of the bed and smoothed back the tangled curtain of hair, trying not to be hurt when she flinched at his touch. "Do you want something to eat?"

Still no answer. Cam sighed. "Sweetheart, you can't keep doing this." He turned her face up to his and the pain burning out of her eyes made his own seem pale by comparison. "You have to talk to me. You have to tell me what's going on."

She shook her head and wrapped her arms tighter around herself.

"Carolyn, please." Cam pleaded, his voice cracking over the words. "Please, baby, talk to me. I can't…I can't lose you too."

Carolyn only stared at him helplessly and turned away onto her other side.

* * *

Carolyn knew he was hurting. She could see it in his eyes. She could _feel_ it coming off him in waves that seemed to clash with the ones coming from her. It was more than she could bear, so she did what had worked her whole life.

She retreated.

"_Carolyn, please."_ His broken whisper echoed in her head as she lay in the dark beside him, knowing that he was awake and aching, just like her.

Her hand drifted to her flat stomach, now empty just like her heart. She had wanted that baby with all her being and she hadn't even been able to carry it to full term. Guilt warred with grief inside her, leaving her awake night after night wondering why it had happened to her. To them.

Carolyn was above all a doctor. She was well aware that almost a quarter of all pregnancies ended in miscarriage and the medical professional in her knew that she couldn't have prevented it, but the awful emptiness inside her drowned out any rational thought.

She felt Cam's hand reach across to her and she allowed him to lace his fingers tightly with hers. He rolled towards her and buried his face in her neck, his breathing ragged as he put his other arm around her and held tightly, as if she would disappear if he didn't.

"Carolyn…" He whispered her name again and tightened his grip almost painfully. "It's not your fault."

The words made her tremble because she realised it was true, but the fact was that her baby hadn't lived and "these things happen" just wasn't enough to ease the gnawing pain inside her.

Her mind screamed at her to talk to him, to react, or she would lose him and she knew that if that happened she wouldn't survive it. Needing someone was new to Carolyn. She didn't know how to deal with the urge to just curl against him and let him carry some of her burden.

She took a deep breath and tangled the fingers of her free hand in his hair, gently stroking the sandy coloured strands. He shuddered once and the tension seemed to drain from him as he pressed his lips to the crook of her neck once and instinctively she knew he had closed his eyes. Carolyn closed her own, praying for sleep to claim her.

* * *

Cam felt her stiffen in her sleep and came awake instantly, flicking the light on and turning to look at her. She was pale and wan looking, even in sleep. A low moan escaped her and Cam noticed tears seeping from under her closed eyelids.

"Carolyn? Wake up, sweetheart." He called out to her softly, not wanting to frighten her. When she opened her eyes and focused on his face, he brushed at the single tear that trickled down her cheek with his thumb. "It's okay," he whispered to her. "It's going to be okay."

She shook her head, another tear escaping. "It was a boy," she whispered, so softly he wasn't sure he had heard it at all.

"I'm sorry?" He wondered briefly if her grief had driven her over the edge, but the sane part of him realised that she was focused on his face for the first time in two weeks and that she was talking to him.

"A boy," Carolyn repeated, wrapping her arms around herself as she sat up in the bed. "I saw my dream. I _saw_ him, Cam. He was real. "

A lump in his throat felt like it was choking him. "Carolyn…"

"He looked just like you," she continued, looking down at her arms, droplets falling from her eyes onto the patchwork quilt Cam's mother had given them as a wedding present. "His name was David." When she looked at Cam again, her eyes were drenched with tears, but she was _there_. His Carolyn. She was looking at him, not through him as she had done for a fortnight now.

"Oh baby." Cam knelt up and pulled her into his lap as her lips trembled and a low, keening sob escaped her, followed by another and another until she was shaking from the force of it. Silently thanking whatever gods were watching, Cam stroked her hair and let her cry. "It's okay," he murmured again, feeling her slight frame shake harder. "It's going to be okay."

When her tears were spent, Cam lay back against the headboard, cradling her against his chest, still stroking her back soothingly.

"It hurts," she whispered, pulling back slightly to look at him.

"I know," he said softly, wiping her cheeks with his thumbs. "I know it does, baby."

"I wanted him so badly." Carolyn's voice cracked on the words, her throat dry and aching from all the crying. "David."

"We'll try again," Cam promised her. When she stiffened, he hurried to finish. "No, honey, I don't mean that. No baby can ever replace this one. But we'll try again. We will have our family, Carolyn."

Carolyn leaned against her husband's chest, exhausted. "I'm so tired," she said quietly. "I'm so tired from hurting and I can't sleep. I keep hearing babies cry in my dreams-"

"Sshh," Cam soothed, gently disentangling her from his hold and laying her down. Ridding himself of his t-shirt, which was dampened from her tears, he carefully pressed his chest to her back and wrapped his arm around her waist, pulling the blankets around them both. "It's okay. Go to sleep, darlin'. I'll be here when you wake up."

Carolyn closedher burning eyes when he pressed his lips to her hair. The pain was still there, still raw and aching, but it no longer felt like she would drown in it. "Cameron?"

"Yes?"

"Thank you."

He kissed her again. "You're welcome, darlin'."

Carolyn sighed once, her breathing deepening and becoming more regular. "Love you," she murmured softly in her sleep.

Cam closed his eyes in silent thanks that she had finally snapped out of her trance. He had been afraid of what he would have had to resort to if she hadn't reacted soon. "I love you too, baby," he whispered into the dark.

* * *

"Cameron?"

He shot off the couch at the sound of her voice, the slight tremor in it making his stomach knot with tension.

Entering their bedroom, he saw her standing at the foot of the bed, her face pale, eyes damp. Dread filled him. "Oh Carolyn, I'm sorry." He crossed the room to hug her gently. "Maybe next month, honey."

She pulled back and looked at him, her lips curving into a tentative smile as she spoke the words he hadn't dared hope to hear in the six months since her miscarriage.

"I'm pregnant."

**And there you have it. I'm sorry it was so angsty, but it's just something that is very close to my heart at the moment. ****I would like to apologise for my long absence and to wish Happy Holidays to you all, whatever you believe or celebrate. **

**Please leave me a review if you find time! **

**Eva x **


	10. I Love You

**Hello everyone, sorry it's been a while, I've been ill again. Hopefully this time the doctors will get it right and put me on the right medication. I'm not sure about this one, especially about the ending scene, so I'd love to know what you all think. **

**Eva**

**I Love You**

"I can't do this anymore." Carolyn heard herself say the words. She had practiced a million variations of them over the past week and she had just decided that the easiest and most practical way was to just say it.

"I'm sorry, what?" Cam shook his head as if he were trying to dislodge some water from his ears. "Where in the hell did that come from?"

Carolyn paced the floor of her living room, unable to sit still. "I can't do this, Cameron. I can't be with you."

Cam sat back, wondering if he were hearing things correctly. "Carolyn, can you please sit down and explain what's going on?" He watched as she reached the end of the sofa and swung around to pace up again. "Carolyn, honey..."

"Don't!" She swung around, dark eyes blazing with a mixture of anger and fear and hurt. "Don't call me that. I can't do this, I can't-"

"Carolyn, listen to me," Cam interrupted, dread beginning to take hold of him. "What's brought this on? You were fine last night."

_But she hadn't been_, he realised with the sickening clarity that usually came with hindsight. She had curled up beside him in his bed and kissed him with a kind of desperation that he had mistaken for passion and responded to in equal kind.

Afterwards, she had curled into his body and held on, as if burning the imprint of him into herself. When he had woken this morning and reached for her, she was already gone.

"Cam?" Those beautiful dark eyes were fixed on him. "I'm sorry."

"Why?" Cam heard himself ask harshly. "Why now?" _Why not before you made me fall in love with you?_

"Because it's not fair to you to keep dragging this out," Carolyn answered, turning away from him again. "It's not right."

"If this is about telling the general that we're dating," Cam began, determined to try and get to the bottom of this mess, "then we don't have to tell him right away."

"This is not about my father," Carolyn answered tightly, her back still turned to him.

"Then what is it about?" Cam asked, gently turning her to face him. "Talk to me, baby. Tell me what's wrong and I'll fix it."

Carolyn shook her head, her long dark hair falling into her eyes. "It's me." She whispered the words softly. "I can't be what you need."

Cam gave an incredulous laugh. "What makes you think I want you to be anything other than who you are?"

"I don't want this," Carolyn cried out, her whole body rigid with tension. "I don't want to be abandoned again."

Cam stared at her before realisation dawned. "You think that I'm going to choose my career over you?"

She laughed shortly, a harsh bitter sound before turning away from him and wrapping her arms around herself. "It's happened before."

"So this _is_ about your father." Cam sighed and scrubbed a hand through his hair. "Darlin, I can't erase the past for you and make things right between you, no matter how much I'd like to. But you can't let that stop you from being happy. And Carolyn, believe me when I say that I can and will make you happy."

She was wavering, he noted. Somewhere inside her, Carolyn believed him. That little sliver of doubt was enough to work with.

"You don't understand," Carolyn whispered. "I watched my mother wait for him, day after day. Night after night. For weeks and months. When he came home, he was different. He'd seen things that changed him."

"War is a scary thing," Cam murmured softly, his mind flickering back to a war that had almost cost him the use of his legs and his career. "And the things you can't talk about are the ones that end up doing the most damage."

Carolyn nodded. "Exactly. Mom tried. She tried to understand and to be there. But somewhere along the line, she stopped trying."

"And it all fell apart," Cam guessed. His heart ached for the child who hadn't understood and for the woman who still struggled to try to forgive an absent father. "Baby, it won't be like that for us."

"How do you know?" Carolyn demanded hotly. "My father used to promise that it would be different, that he'd be home, that this time he'd stay, but the phone would ring and off he would go again."

"Carolyn, you know about my work," Cam said patiently, itching to wrap his arms around her but knowing that it wasn't the right time. "It's not like I have to lie to you every time I step outside the door."

"It's not that," Carolyn said, sinking down onto her sofa and closing her eyes against the flood of tears that threatened. "We've been together for three months now, and I've gone from being independent to being...weak."

"Weak?" Cam echoed, wondering how being with him equated to weakness.

"Yes," Carolyn snapped out. "Weak. I miss you when you're not there. I wonder if you're safe when you're off-world. I worry until you come home and my first instinct when you walk into my infirmary after a mission is to either kiss you for coming home or kill you for going in the first place."

Cam smiled at her words. "And you think it's not the same for me?"

Carolyn looked up, a little confused. "Is it?"

Cam nodded earnestly. "I miss you when I don't see you. When I'm off-world I wonder if you miss me." He grinned widely. "And I think about kissin' you quite a bit."

Carolyn shook her head. "Don't try to use that southern charm on me, Mitchell. It won't work." She curled her hands into fists to keep from reaching out to him. "I won't be dependant on anybody, Cameron. I can't be. That's why you have to go."

"Carolyn-"

"Please," she whispered. "I just need some time. Please."

Cam sat still for a moment, then got up from the sofa. "I'll go if you want me to. But Carolyn? I'm not that easy to get rid of."

Carolyn kept her back to him until she heard the front door shut, feeling her throat ache with unshed tears. When she heard the engine start and the sound fade away, she slumped forward and gave in to her misery, sobbing as if her heart would break.

* * *

Cam gave her two days. He figured that was enough time for her to realise that even after a short time, what they were building was worth holding on to.

He missed her. That was the pure truth. He missed the way she smelled like vanilla and clean, fresh soap. He missed the way she frowned at him when he tried to distract her from whatever she was doing.

He missed the feel of her, curled next to him when they spend a rare night off together.

Carolyn avoided him in the halls, the mess, and her infirmary, leaving his pre and post mission physicals to another doctor and always finding some excuse to avoid being alone with him.

At the end of the second day, Cam was past miserable and heading rapidly towards a mixture of anger at how easily she had given up and fear that perhaps this was something they couldn't overcome.

He knew his teammates suspected something. Even Vala was more tactful than usual and that in itself was some sort of minor miracle. Sam and Daniel did their best to keep his mind occupied, while Teal'c worked out with him in the gym to burn off some of the restless energy that had taken hold of him.

Nothing seemed to work, though. He still had this uneasy feeling, right in the pit of his stomach, that wouldn't go away.

Dammit, he was not going to be brushed aside like this. He would go and see her and try to talk some sense into her.

Feeling somewhat less miserable at the thought, Cam slammed his locker door shut and headed towards the infirmary.

* * *

Carolyn was working on some research into what was potentially an airborne mutation of the common flu virus that was causing some problems for one of their trading planets. She rubbed at her temples, trying to ease the vague headache that had been nagging her all day.

"Headache?"

The sound of Cam's voice made her jump.

"Sorry," he said, not sounding at all contrite. "We need to talk."

Carolyn nodded. "Yes, we do. But not here." She saved her work and shut down her laptop. "Are you done for the day?"

"Yep," Cam answered shortly. "You?"

"About three hours ago," Carolyn answered wryly. She didn't mention that she didn't want to go home to bed because she could smell his cologne on her sheets and it hurt her to the core.

"Working too hard as usual," Cam said, trying for a teasing tone and failing.

"It helps," she responded quietly.

Cam looked at her, struck by the dullness of her eyes. "Does it? Because from where I'm standing, it sure as hell doesn't look like it."

"This isn't the place to discuss it," Carolyn said evenly, ignoring the curious eyes of three marines that passed by. "Too many people."

"Right," Cam said bitterly. "And we wouldn't want people to know that the general's daughter is dating a mere pilot." He stabbed furiously at the call button for the elevator.

"Cameron, I didn't mean-"

"Not here, remember?" Cam folded his arms and waited for her to go ahead of him. They rode in silence to the top level and got out at the parking lot.

Carolyn hurried to keep up to his longer strides as she followed him to his car. Hers was in the garage and she had hitched a ride with one of her nurses that morning. When she told him this, he gave her a curt nod.

"I'll take you home."

* * *

The silence hung between them all the way through the short drive to Carolyn's house. Cam didn't say a word and Carolyn didn't know what to say to him. Silence was just easier.

Inside her house, she automatically hung her coat up in the hall and watched him go into her small living room and take a seat on the sofa. Needing a moment to steady herself, she went into the kitchen and set the kettle to boil for coffee.

The rain had begun to fall outside in steady sheets that dripped off her back window and made her feel even more melancholy than she had before.

She missed him. That was the crux of it. She missed the slow, easy smile that spread across his face when he saw her in the halls or the infirmary. She missed the way he would squeeze her hand an gently kiss her cheek when nobody was watching.

"You can't avoid me forever."

At the sound of Cam's voice, Carolyn swung around. He leaned against the door frame, hands in his pockets in a deceptively casual pose.

"Would you like some coffee?" Carolyn asked. She winced inwardly when his jaw clenched and he shook his head. "Something to eat?"

"I didn't come here to eat," Cam answered shortly. He scrubbed a hand through his hair and sighed. "Damn it, Carolyn, I'm sorry. It's just been..."

"I know," she answered quietly. To her horror, tears welled in her eyes and she blinked at them furiously. "I'm sorry, Cam. I never meant to-"

"I know." It was Cam's turn to interrupt her. "I know you didn't mean it, but you can't just cut me out of your life and expect me to lie down and accept it."

"Why won't you?" Carolyn asked softly. "It might be easier for you in the long run."

Cam laughed softly. "Darlin, being with you is a constant challenge. You're prickly, stubborn and you are far too independant for your own good." He reached out and clasped her hands in his. "But no matter how crazy you make me, being without you is a million times worse."

Carolyn snorted through her tears. "You sound like a character in a soap opera."

"I kind of feel like one," Cam admitted with a shrug. "I feel like I've been on a rollercoaster for the past two days."

"Me too," Carolyn whispered, looking down at her hands, which were still engulfed in Cam's. "I hate this."

"Arguing?" Cam asked. "Because knowing us, we'll argue a hell of a lot. But you have to tell me when something's wrong. I don't read minds, Carolyn. I can't see into your head."

"I'm scared," she whispered, not looking up at him.

"What are you scared of?"

"I'm scared of being like my mother and being in love with someone who can't or won't love me back." Carolyn blurted out the words and waited for his anger.

"You think I can't or won't love you?" Cam was amazed. "That's why you pushed me away? Because you think that I don't love you?"

Carolyn nodded miserably. "I'm stubborn. I'll push you to talk about things you won't want to. I'll nag you to death or else-"

"You do all those things already," Cam pointed out. "And I still love you."

Carolyn looked up at him, scarcely daring to believe the words. "What did you say?"

"I love you," Cam repeated emphatically. "Did you really think that I wouldn't?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"Because my own father didn't love me enough to give up his job and stick around," Carolyn answered bitterly. "Why would you love me when my own Dad doesn't?"

"That's not true," Cam countered. He wiped a tear from her face with his thumb. "Your dad loves you. He's trying, Carolyn."

"Too late," she said shortly. "Too little, too late."

"Honey, you have to forgive him sometime," Cam sighed. "Until you do, you'll never be happy."

"I thought I could be," Carolyn mused. "But I managed to screw that up too."

"You didn't screw anything up," Cam told her. "I'm still here."

"Are you?" Carolyn asked tentatively. "Even though I've been an idiot?"

"I told you, I don't give up easily." Cam felt the weight he had been carrying around for the past two days lift from him. "Not when it's something this important."

Carolyn took a deep breath and faced him squarely. "We need to tell my father about us."

Cam gaped at her in disbelief. "What?"

"Because we need to prove that we can work together and be in a relationship," Carolyn answered. "I can do my job even if I'm head over heels in love with his golden boy."

Cam felt a smile spread across his face. "You love me."

Carolyn bit her lip and nodded. "I do."

Exhaling a sigh of relief, Cam yanked her across into his lap and clamped his mouth to hers possessively. "Thank God," he muttered, kissing her cheeks and her nose before his lips began a path down the side of her neck. "I was afraid I'd have to lock you up until you admitted it."

Carolyn gasped as his lips found a spot just under her ear. "That wouldn't have worked."

Cam ran his hands along her stomach, just underneath the dark green sweater and she shuddered. "Okay, maybe it would have worked."

Cam's hands tightened on her hips and it as his turn to shudder as her fingers burrowed under the gray tee shirt he wore to dance lightly across his abs. "We're talking too much."

"Agreed," she murmured, her breathing quickening as she pulled his tee shirt over his head and he reached out to yank hers off.

Bare skin met bare skin and the sensation made Carolyn moan with a mixture of longing and relief. "No more talking," she ordered.

"Yes, ma'am." Cam pulled her tighter against him and kissed her hard enough to make her forget everything except the feel of his hands on her skin and his lips on hers.

Later, when their clothing was scattered around the living room and they lay in a tangle of arms and legs on the sofa, Carolyn smiled sleepily against Cam's chest. "I love you, too," she whispered.

Cam ran his hand down her bare back and pulled the blanket closer around them. "Took you long enough."

Carolyn swatted at him playfully and he captured her hand in his, pulling him towards her for a searing kiss. "Love you too."

**Love it? Hate it? Please let me know. **


	11. Chapter 11: Gift

**Chapter 12: Gift**

The fact that it was the middle of the night didn't matter, nor did the fact that it was happening almost three full weeks earlier than expected. To the small group of people sitting outside the SGC infirmary, all that mattered was that it was happening now and they were going absolutely nowhere until it was over.

"What's taking so long?" Vala stopped pacing long enough to voice her concern. "We've been here for _hours_."

"Three hours," Daniel said mildly, taking off his glasses and polishing them for the third time in ten minutes. "These things take time."

Vala snorted and resumed her pacing, muttering to herself about men and how little they knew about the whole ordeal. When she passed him for the eighth time, Daniel reached out and pulled her into the chair next to him, putting an arm around her shoulders.

Vala leaned gratefully into him and closed her eyes.

Watching them, Sam smiled at the way Daniel could calm the fiery Vala with a mere look or touch. Those two were polar opposites in every way, but they managed to balance each other perfectly.

"Colonel Carter, report." General Landry appeared out of nowhere, his hair standing on end and his eyes a little wild.

Sam, who had surged to her feet at his appearance, fought the urge to chuckle. "No news yet, sir."

"What's taking so long?" Landry demanded. "They've been here for hours!"

"Three hours, General," Vala said with a smirk at Daniel. "These things take time. Days, sometimes, I'm told. I was lucky, myself, when I gave birth to Adria. Although I did find that the pressure through my-"

"Thank you, Vala," Daniel interrupted, seeing General Landry turn a little pale. "You can tell the general that fascinating story some other time."

Vala nodded obediently and settled against him once more.

Teal'c, who had remained silent throughout the entire exchange, rose to his feet. "I believe that some coffee ma y be in order. General Landry, would you care for some refreshment?"

"Coffee all around, I think," Sam put in with a smile. "Thanks, Teal'c." She looked at the general, who was gazing at the closed door of the infirmary as if he could see through it. "Sir, it may be some time yet."

Landry gave her a distracted nod and turned his attention back to the door. "I'll wait."

* * *

Cameron Mitchell loved his wife. He had done so from the first moment he laid eyes on her and through all the countless moments since, but he doubted that he'd ever love her more than he did right now.

"Push," Sadie, the doctor on duty, commanded from the foot of the bed. "Come on, Doctor, I'm giving the orders for once. Push!"

"That's it," Cam encouraged from his position behind Carolyn. He helped her to sit forward and counted with her as she bore down. "You're doing great, honey."

"You're never coming near me again," Carolyn growled fiercely, squeezing his hand until he felt the bones grind together. "Not ever!"

Cam merely kissed her sweaty hair and nodded his agreement. "Okay, sweetheart."

"Don't call me sweetheart," Carolyn shrieked, trying to twist in his arms. "That's what got me here in the first place – God, that hurts!" Her guttural groan turned to a whimper as she fell back against him. "I can't do this."

"You can," Cam soothed, wishing that he could take her pain away. "You know you can."

"It's too early," Carolyn fretted, arching against another contraction. "It's too early, Cam. We were only visiting! It wasn't meant to happen here. We've got a nice room booked in the hospital!"

Cam laughed softly. "It's the perfect place for this, sweetheart. You have more medical technology here than any damn hospital in the world."

"Your parents won't be able to visit,"Carolyn moaned. "My _mother_ won't be able to visit."

"Darlin, all you need to worry about right now is getting this little one into the world." Cam stroked her matted hair back from her face. "We'll figure the rest out when she gets here."

Carolyn yelped as the next contraction spiked through her, leaving her breathless. "It hurts!"

"I know, baby. Come on, we're almost there." Cam pushed her forward again and held on tight as she fought to bring their baby into the world. Sadie's steady voice faded and the room around him blurred as his entire world centered on the woman beside him. An indignant wail filled the room and he came back to reality with a shock as Carolyn slumped against him, laughing and crying at the same time.

"Well done," Sadie declared with a big smile. She deftly wiped the wriggling infant and cut the cord so that she could wrap a blanket around the tiny body. "Colonel Mitchell, Doctor Mitchell, say hello to your son."

* * *

At the sound of an infant crying, General Landry surged to his feet and looked around at the rest of SG1. "Did you hear that?"

"We sure did, sir." Sam's grin turned to laughter as Vala shrieked with excitement and flung her arms around her. "Congratulations, Grandpa."

"Grandpa," the general murmured dazedly, accepting Daniel's handshake and not batting an eyelid when Vala gave him an exuberant hug before launching herself at Teal'c. "_Grandpa_."

They waited impatiently until Cam poked his head out of the infirmary door and signalled to them to come in.

Carolyn looked up at their arrival and smiled at her father. "Hi, Grandpa."

General Landry beamed proudly and leaned in to kiss his daughter's cheek. "Hello, Mom."

"Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like you all to meet Brian Henry Mitchell." Cam beamed with pride as they clustered around the bed, grinning at the baby.

Carolyn's smile grew as she looked down at her son. "Say hello to your family, Brian." She held the blanket wrapped infant out to the general. "Here's your grandson."

"Congratulations," Daniel said softly, leaning in to kiss Carolyn's cheek. "You too, Mitchell."

"I'm so proud of you," Cam said quietly into his wife's ear as their son was passed around to his teammates. "You were amazing."

Carolyn leaned against him and slipped her hand into his. "I was, wasn't I?" She laughed as Vala pouted until Sam passed the baby over to her.

"Hello, Brian." Vala cooed and looked up at Daniel, eyes glowing. "Isn't he beautiful?"

"Without a doubt," Daniel agreed. "Share him, Vala." He accepted the baby with ease and peered down into his tiny face. "Welcome to the world, Brian Mitchell." His smile at Vala was soft and tender. "Maybe we'll get to work on making you a girlfriend."

Vala's answering smile lit up the room.

* * *

Cam waved at Sam as she headed out of the door and shut it behind her. Turning to his wife, he grinned. "Alone again."

"Easy, flyboy," Carolyn said wryly, but her dark eyes danced with laughter. "There's a child present."

Cam reached out to run his finger along the top of his son's head. "He's perfect."

Carolyn cuddled the infant closer to her chest and closed her eyes. "I never thought we'd have him," she admitted. "After losing David, I didn't dare to hope..."

Cam nodded, remembering the devastating effect her miscarriage had had on them. "I know."

"But now he's here," Carolyn continued, not taking her eyes off the sleeping baby. "It makes all the pain worth it."

Cam kissed her gently. "I'll remind you of that when you want another one." He toed off his shoes and stretched out beside her, thankful to Sadie for allowing them to shove two beds together so that he wouldn't have to spend the night in a chair. "Come on, Momma, you need your sleep."

As he settled next to his wife, their son sleeping between them, he thought that sometimes life really did hand you the most amazing gifts and baby Brian was without doubt the most precious of them all.

**It's been too long. I can only apologise, but I just haven't been well enough to post. This is dedicated to the "Gift" that the stork left two friends of mine this morning at 00:18 am. **

**Welcome to the world, Corey John **

**Eva x**


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12: Panic**

Cam tugged his t-shirt on over his head and sat down to pull on his socks and boots. SG-1 had just beed dismissed to go home after being stuck off-world for three days trying to negotiate a peace treaty and he was dying to get home to his family.

Just as he was reaching for his leather jacket, his cell phone rang. Peering at the display, he grinned to himself and tapped the screen. "Couldn't wait for me to get home?"

"_Cam." _

Her voice sounded frantic and Cam instantly tensed. "Carolyn? What's wrong?"

"_It's Brian." _

Cam felt his heart stutter in his chest. Instinct took over and he headed for the door at a run, skidding to a halt in front of the elevator and pressing the call button repeatedly. "Where are you?"

"_At the hospital,"_ Carolyn answered. _"The school called, they said he had fallen and to meet them_ _here."_ Her voice wavered and cracked. _"Cam, he won't wake up and they won't let me in there with him."_

"Where's Sarah?" Cam asked, throwing himself into the elevator when it opened and tugging on his jacket without missing a beat. "Is she with you?"

"_She's here,"_ Carolyn answered. _"I just grabbed her and ran. Cam, he-"_

"I'm on my way, darlin," Cam soothed, trying to calm his wife despite his own racing heart. IF Carolyn were panicking, it was not good.

The elevator door opened and General Landry appeared. "Mitchell, I need you to come with me."

"Sir, Carolyn just called. Brian's been hurt and he's at the hospital. Sir, I need to go – "

General Landry paled slightly, but held up a hand. He tapped the earpiece he was wearing and spoke clearly. "Walter, get Ellis on the radio. Tell him that I'm authorising immediate transport to Colorado University Hospital for Colonel Mitchell."

Cam nodded his thanks wordlessly.

"Keep me posted, Mitchell," the general ordered. "I want to know the moment you hear anything, good or bad."

"Yes, sir," Cam answered before he found himself up on the control deck of the Oddyssey. "Colonel, thank you for this."

Ellis nodded. "The general orders, I obey. Hope whoever you're visiting is okay."

Cam found himself standing at a side entrance to the hospital seconds later. A quick glance around confirmed that nobody had seen him, although he knew that Captain Collins would have made sure of that before he sent him down. The ship's first officer was a stickler for the details.

He entered the building at a run and stopped at the first nurses station he saw. "Brian Mitchell?" His crisp tone made it clear that he wasn't in the mood for platitudes.

She glanced at her screen and frowned. "Turn right at the end of the corridor, take the third left and you'll see your wife." She gave him an arch look. "If you could try to keep her from interrogating my staff, it would be _very_ much appreciated."

Cam glared at her and took off, darting around doctors and patients. When he turned into the hallway indicated, he saw Carolyn pacing and wringing her hands and Sarah sleeping on the chair beside her. The sight unnerved him. Carolyn never panicked. Not when Brian had needed stitches after falling from the fence at his parents' house; not when Sarah fell and ended up with a black eye while trying to jump off the sofa.

His earlier thought ran through his head again. If Carolyn were panicking, it was really not good.

She looked up and spotted him, darting down the hallway towards him and crashing into him.

"Carolyn, what happened? Where is he?" He cupped her face in his hands, every horrific scenario running through his mind.

"He fell out of a tree," Carolyn managed to say, her voice breaking. "His arm is broken and they think that he hit his head...he won't wake up, Cam."

Cameron drew her into his arms, stroking a soothing hand down her ponytail and closing his eyes in a silent plea to the gods to take care of his boy. Brian was a sunny little boy, content to play with his toy planes and entertain his baby sister for hours with mindless chatter. He was five now, but still their baby boy and the center of their world. They would never be the same without him.

Shaking his head to clear it of his morbid thoughts, Cam gave a quick glance at his daughter to make sure she was still asleep and concentrated on trying to soothe his wife.

"He'll be okay," he murmured, cheek pressed against her hair as she gripped fistfuls of his sweater. "He's tough."

"Remember the time he hid under Dad's desk?" Carolyn said with a half laugh. "He fell asleep and we were frantic."

Cam smiled. "Or the time he tried to sneak that mangy puppy home from Mom and Dad's?"

"We should get him a dog," Carolyn said, sitting in the chair when he urged her to. She leaned her head against her husband's solid shoulder. "Oh God, Cam, what if-"

"Mrs Mitchell?" A doctor dressed in green scrubs and a white lab coat stepped out from the exam room and stepped towards them.

Cam surged to his feet and gripped his wife's hands. "Is he okay, Doc?"

The doctor nodded and Cam felt his knees go weak with relief. A glance at Carolyn's white face made him tighten his grip on her.

"What are his vitals?" Carolyn asked in a clipped tone, straightening her spine and clearing her throat. "Have you run a CT and blood work?"

"Honey, maybe you should let the doc give us the lowdown," Cam suggested gently.

"Mr Mitchell, Doctor Mitchell, Brian hit his head when he fell out of the tree," the doctor, whose name tag read 'Mark Carroll, MD' began. "His arm is broken, so we've put a cast on it. The bang to his head caused a concussion. He's awake, but a little groggy at the moment. We expect that he'll be back to normal, barring the cast, of course, in a couple of days."

Carolyn sagged against Cam in relief. "When can we see him?"

Dr Carroll smiled. "I had thought to keep him overnight, but seeing as his mother is a doctor, I think we can release him today. You can see him shortly."

"Thank you, Doc," Cam said fervently, shaking the man's hand. "We appreciate it."

"Mama?" A little voice piped up from behind them. Sarah sat up, rubbing at her eyes with a small fist. She spied Cam and let out a squeal. "Daddy!"

"Hey there, sweetpea," Cam greeted, tossing her in the air and rubbing his cheek against hers. "How's my favourite girl?"

Sarah's dark hair bounced around her face and Cam noticed, as he did every time he looked at her, how much she resembled her mother. "Bwian fell," she informed him seriously. "He hurt."

"He's hurt, but he'll be okay," Cam assured her. He turned to look at his wife, who was still tense looking. "How about we go and see him, huh?"

"See Bwian!" Sarah clapped her hands. Brian was her hero and she adored him with all of her three-year old heart.

In the cubicle, Brian was stirring and opened bleary eyes as Carolyn grabbed his chart and scanned it quickly. She dropped it and hurried to his side to pepper his face with kisses, despite his protests. When Brian noticed his cast, his eyes lit up. "Look! Mom, look! How cool is that!"

"Very cool," Cam said dryly, tousling Brian's sandy coloured hair. "But you almost gave your mom and I a heart attack. What were you doing up that tree, son?"

Brian looked guilty. "I was trying to climb to the top to see the baby birds."

"Next time, don't do that," Carolyn chided, wrapping her arm around him and squeezing gently. "Come on, let's get you home."

* * *

Brian lay in his bed, sprawled face down with his good arm dangling off the side. His face was peaceful in sleep. Cam watched as Carolyn smoothed the covers over him before turning on his night light and kissing his forehead. She went down the hall to Sarah's room and repeated the gesture, making him smile.

Carolyn was outwardly tough, but when it came to her children she was as soft as butter and as protective as a tigress.

Back in their bedroom, Carolyn gave him an absent smile as he came out of the bathroom after brushing his teeth. She went in and turned on the shower as Cam got undressed and into bed.

Ten minutes later, the water stopped running and Cam heard her get out. Moments later, she padded across the room silently and crawled into bed beside him. Cam reached out to turn off the bedside lights and saw his wife's face and the silent tears streaming down her cheeks.

"Darlin..." The word came out on a sigh. "He's fine."

Carolyn shook her head, tears streaming from her dark eyes. "I panicked, Cam. I was useless."

Cam pulled her into his side and stroked a hand down her back. "You're a brilliant doctor, sweetheart. But today, you were a momma who thought that her little boy was badly hurt."

"I couldn't do anything," Carolyn choked out, making a futile attempt to dry her eyes, but they kept leaking tears. "Brian was unconscious and I couldn't think, I couldn't even _breathe_ for a second."

"Momma," Cam reminded her. "It trumps doctor any and every time."

Carolyn sniffled and laughed as he made a face and reached across her for a tissue from the box she kept on her nightstand. "Sorry."

"Blow," Cam commanded, holding it to her nose and grinning when she rolled her eyes and obliged. "That's better." He kissed her nose. "You look like a tomato."

"Hey!" Carolyn smacked his shoulder. "Be the gentleman Wendy raised you to be."

"Beautiful," Cam amended quickly, pressing a kiss to her nose.

"Better," Carolyn said, satisfied. "Keep going."

"Beautiful," he repeated, kissing her cheek and tracing a path down the side of her neck with his lips.

Carolyn sighed and wrapped her arms around him. "Now you're talking."

**Thank you to my sole reviewer for the last chapter. I decided to keep going while I felt up to it, and this little chapter was inspired by another story I read somewhere. I can't remember the author or story name, so if you see it and it reminds you of yours, I meant no harm. **

**Eva**


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